We are headed home for the Christmas holiday in a couple of weeks. My grandmum offered to fly us home because she has yet to meet her great grandson. And as the son of her favoured granddaughter, and the first born blood great grandchild, it is important to her that they meet. I had hoped to celebrate the holiday here, as a family of three, attending Christmas liturgy at our parish with little bug's godfather, but that won't be the case.
I don't want to sound ungrateful for this gift, and I realize that I am, but I wanted our decision to make the financially sound decision to be the final decision regarding this matter. I did not want family interference or offerings. I just wanted to be.
On a happier note, Sir and I seem to be doing much better. It has now been almost a month since we've had a serious argument, and we are laughing much more now. Our sex life could use some work, but with everything going on, and sharing our bedroom with little bug, time and space are two luxeries that we simply don't have at the moment. But he's been stepping up much more, and the bamboo has come out a couple of times, as has his natural dominance. We seem to be in a good place. Am I satisfied with where we are? For now it works, like I said, we have very little time and space. But we have made the decision to move into a larger apartment next summer which will definitely help. And if I am offered a position with the company then he will be able to leave his job, which will give both of us more energy.
Sir opened up to me the other night about some of his fears about being a dom. One of them I'm hoping to get some readers advice with. He is concerned that being dominate is the same thing as being selfish and that in being a dom he won't be as good of a husband or man to me. Can anyone offer some words of wisdom to that?
It's the strangest thing, but being your Dom is one of the unique ways that only he as your husband can fulfill your needs.
ReplyDeleteThis is in part due to how you appear to be wired, as a submissive. You find pleasure in his pleasure or his dominance over you or in serving him. (There are different types of submissives.) You can trust very few people in a lifetime with such complete submission, and, in monogamy, only one when you extend it to sex.
The dominant is always using his dominance to love and serve and nurture his submissive. Always. Even when he is choosing to demand somethig "selfish" because he finds through listening and experimenting that doing so fulfills her need.
It is far more selfish to ignore those needs. It takes courage and love to bs the best husband and man he can be to you by giving concentrated attention to you and what you need, and staying oriented toward your good when he takes action and takes complete control, perhaps in even rough or uncomfortable ways, in spite of his initial reticence that somehow this makes him a lesser man.
If it helps any, God is not selfish in his being in complete control, nor in his seeking His own glory. He does it all from a position of love and service, and yet, the power and strength and glory and honor are all His. He is the ultimate Dom.
Beth Elle